Holy shit, you guys. The stingrays are out for blood! Check it: This woman died of RAY TO THE FACE.
YOU COULD BE NEXT.
Seriously, this should be a campaign issue. Health care? WHAT GOOD IS HEALTHCARE WHEN THE STINGRAYS ARE ON A RAMPAGE?!?! Somewhere in the Caribbean, they are circling, declaring in the secret tongue of stingrays, "Steve Irwin was only the first to fall!"
But dude! Read the article! These suckers are so hardcore, they kill people with their faces!
I KNOW RIGHT.
If you want to fight back, join the Stingray Threat Undercover Defenses (S.T.U.D.) today!
In other news, there are sometimes certain things you don't want to hear, ever, under certain circumstances.
As some of you know, it's been a crazy term, but I am finally taking spring break off and am back in my old hometown for the week. My dad's house is pretty nice digs, and it's always good to be back, so everything's shiny, aye?
Only yesterday morning, I go upstairs to fix some breakfast, go near the sink, and out of the blue I hear this furious buzzing. And on the windowsill appears not one, but two bees.
Some of you may also know that I have a strong dislike, bordering on crippling fear, of bees. That being said, I am not exaggerating when I say that these bees appeared to have crawled from the pits of apian Hell.
They were the same shape as a honey bee, but larger, and black,
not in the fuzzy-fat-happy bumblebee way, but this creepy Venom : Spiderman :: Beelzebee : NORMAL BEE
way. (For anyone who never had to do analogies as a kid, you were deprived.)
So I call my father up, as he is out making his musical therapist rounds (don't ask.)
"So, Dad. Did you, perchance, know that there are bees in the kitchen?"
This was one of those situations where there are certain things you really
do not want to hear. For example, my father's response:
"Oh, funny story, that...."
Funny story? Funny story?!
Funny story is Lady Getting Smeared by a Stingray. Funny story is not our kitchen being flooded with Satan's Honeymakers.
Apparently bees in the kitchen is a recurring thing. All I'm sayin' is if they don't get to steppin', Raid's gonna be a recurring thing too. >[
Also I totally got to see Barack Obama last night. He was, like, ten feet away. It was so damn cool.
A side note--not to wax too political here, but--well, if you're voting Republican, power to ye, but if you're more left-leaning and you're undecided? I'd nudge you towards Obama. Not because Hillary is the Great Satan,
but (partially) because she's not exactly the Gaming Industry's best friend,
and I know that actually is something that impacts a lot of you guys.
Plus, the dame eats babies. So. You know. Yeah.
THE STINGRAY WANTS FLESH.